Contagious

WOW! I wonder if I cause someone else to have a rotten attitude or a healthy attitude?

Check this out:
http://withoutwax.tv/2010/04/28/its-contagious/

Marriage: STILL more to learn

I follow Pastor Noble's blog because I like the way that he just comes out and says what is on his mind (and everyone else's). I think we all would be better people and get along better if we would quit trying to "keep from hurting feelings". Here is part two of Pastor Noble's post about marriage:

Things I’ve Learned About Marriage In Ten Years–

Here are lessons 6-10 following up with yesterday’s post…

#6 – The Purpose Of Conflict Is To SETTLE The Argument…Not Win It!
Lucretia called me out on this one night when I was getting my rear end whipped during a disagreement we were having. So…in a desperate move I began to change the subject, to bring up things that had NOTHING to do with what we were discussing. I was doing it to try to get out of the hole I had dug for myself…and then she said she felt like I was trying to win instead of really caring about settling the conflict. BUSTED! Staying focused on an issue and trying to settle THAT issue isn’t just a good idea for marriage…it’s essential!

#7 – Don’t Ever Go To Bed Mad At One Another!
Unresolved conflict will KILL a marriage! (See Ephesians 4:25-26!) AND…it gives the enemy a foothold so that he can then climb all over a couple. There is NEVER a good reason for two people who love Jesus and love one another to not deal with an issue that is stealing intimacy away from that couple.

#8 – You Cannot Hold Your Spouse Accountable For Unspoken, Unrealistic Expectations!
Like it or not…your spouse cannot read your mind–period!

#9 – Intimacy Is Not Limited To A Sexual Experience!
AND…if you think it is then there is probably ZERO intimacy in your marriage. AND…you CAN have sex without having intimacy. BUT (guys…read this please) you can’t have intimacy without having sex!!! When a couple (specifically the man) will focus on creating a romantic environment rather than just getting her in bed, thus making her feel valuable, romantic and pursued…well…then…uh…DANG!

#10 – It Takes Work To Make It Work!
I hear couples say from time to time, “But Pastor P…marriage is SO HARD!” My response is always, “duh…and water’s SOOOO wet!” Yes it’s hard…if it were easy then 50% of all marriages would not be ending in divorce!!! If we want the most OUT of marriage then we’ve got to be willing to work IN the marriage and ON the marriage! EVERY couple that I know that has a successful marriage did not achieve that success by accident…it took intentional, focused and unselfish WORK to make it happen!!!

BTW…let me say this because my wife DOES read my blog. I said that I have learned these 10 lessons…BUT let me be VERY clear that I have NOT mastered them!!! I’m a work in progress…and am so thankful that I am married to a woman who understands that!

Marriage: more to learn

This past March 2nd my wife and I celebrated 19 years of marriage! I believe that I have a previous post about that event but I read today a post from one of the blogs that I follow and I want to share that post with you today as well. No matter how long or newly wed you and your spouse are these comments from Perry Noble could come in handy:

Things I’ve Learned About Marriage In Ten Years…


Last week my amazing wife and I celebrated 10 years of marriage…and during that time I’ve learned A LOT! (AND still have SO MUCH more to learn!) Here are a few things…

#1 – Never “Talk Yourself Into Marrying A Person!” You had better KNOW!

When it came to marrying Lucretia it wasn’t something that I had to convince myself was the right thing to do…I knew she was the one for me. (And she would say the same thing!) If you go into the marriage with serious doubts then you will be tempted to sprint out of it at the first sign of trouble (and trouble WILL find you!) If you are trying to convince yourself that he/she is “right” for you then you may be on VERY dangerous ground! I know God has called me into this marriage and will fill me with the strength to sustain it…even during the tough times! (Philippians 1:6)

#2 – Marriage Is Not About What You Can Get…It’s About What You Can Give!

When a person enters marriage with a list of expectations that they want the other person to meet then there are going to be “issues!” We’ve got to view marriage NOT as an opportunity to be served…but rather to serve. Just think…how awesome would marriages be if each person did all that they could to try and outserve the other person!

#3 – To Expect Another Person To Meet All Of Your Needs Is Incredibly Selfish!

I HATE IT when a couple is having problems and I begin talking with them and then one person says, “Well…they just aren’t meeting my needs!” First of all…another person will NEVER meet all of our needs…EVER! And…second of all, the person who is usually doing the complaining probably doesn’t have a halo on…in other words, they probably aren’t “meeting the needs” of the other person! Many marriages fall apart not because of “irreconcilable differences” but rather unrepentant, selfish people!

#4 – Have Fun Together!

When couples date they have fun…when they get married it seems there is a sprint to become as “normal” as possible as soon as possible. Guess what–normal sucks! The LAST thing I want to be is a “normal married couple!”

#5 – “Quality Time” Does Not Mean “Let’s Have A Conversation During The Commercials!”

OUCH…this one has taken me longer to learn that I would like to admit. Unfortunately…men LOVE to get home and turn on the television, even if they aren’t watching it…we just are addicted to noise. AND…trying to talk to her AND watch it ISN’T romantic in her book (and “her book” is the ONLY one that should matter!) If a couple does not carve out intentional time for communication…it WON’T happen. This means there needs to be a lot less tv/twitter/facebook in a lot of peoples lives!